How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Contraction

I hate group projects. You can never really tell if your group-mates will live up to their side of the bargain. Luckily for me, one of my team members was on top of things, hell, he was the one sweating bullets for the rest of us. Then another member was completely AWOL, waiting in line for a Shocktoberfest wristband rather than contributing to a report that was due the next day. The last group member--well, let's just say he inspired this entry.

As the team writer, it was up to me to get everybody's notes and write a report based on it. After I finished, I sent it out again for "final edits." The last group member, whom I shall henceforth refer to as "DH," pointed out that I had many mistakes that had to be corrected--namely--the contractions.

So there really are people in this world who are still hung up on this concept of contractions. I told him that there was nothing wrong with contractions, but his rebuttal was "Well I want to get a good grade." The poor fool has been brainwashed by a system that has turned guidelines into absolutes.

During my grade school days, I remember my teachers admonishing the students for using contractions in "formal" essays. Children today are now taught to fear the contraction, for its use provokes censure. I think this is a horrible thing. There are certainly arguments against the use of contractions, but to instill such fear of the concept is going a little overboard.

As you can probably tell, I love my contractions. It irritates me whenever somebody, such a peer reviewer, points out contractions as an error. There's nothing inherently wrong with a contraction or else it wouldn't exist to begin with. I love contractions because it serves its function well, to communicate clearly and concisely. The most important thing about writing isn't styles or formalities; it's about how well you can communicate. Writing is a fundamental medium of communication. Whether or not you use contractions has no bearing on the communicative aspect--actually, I would argue that contractions, due to its ubiquitous use in everyday conversation, could possibly enhance communication.

There's more to formality than splitting "don't" into "do not." I can still write an incredibly formal essay chock-full of contractions. Formality is really determined by the content of writing, not how you present it. That idea may run contrary to what is taught in school, but getting rid of contractions doesn't make your story of taking a shit in the bathroom any more formal than its subject matter.

So when is it not appropriate to use a contraction? It's really a matter of respect. If you're writing a request to somebody above you, it might be better to not use contractions. Yet, even in that situation, I still find myself using a contraction just because it’s natural to me. It's natural to everybody, because that's the way we speak. Maybe I'm just completely off-base here and contractions really are the devil's playthings. If it is truly sin to contract, don't expect me to repent.