Foodies

There is nothing more boring than listening to someone drone on about the dream they had the other night, no matter how weird or awesome it was because guess what? We don't care.

The only exception is when a person talks about food.

Girls are amazingly guilty about this. You would think they had no other hobbies except for eating. Every time an animated conversation about food starts, I shake my head. Seriously? You guys are talking about food? It must be an exceptionally boring time if its time to talk food. The thing about food is, it's not a subject to be talked about, its a subject to be eaten.

Most food topics can be summed up in two words, alright and delicious. Anything more than that and you're overdoing it. In the case that it tastes like shit, then you can also say that it tastes like shit, even though none of us actually knows what shit taste like (hopefully).

So the next time food comes up in a conversation, just tell me: is it alright, delicious, or shit?

Random Notes from Shoctoberfest 2010

As a reporter, you accumulate a lot of junk when you cover events. There are things that you just have to cut out no matter how interesting (or uninteresting) they are. Although I would say that my Shoctoberfest story is complete as it is, there are, nonetheless, elements that must see the light of day before being banished forever from the realm of my notepad.

I present to you: Random Notes from Shoctoberfest 2010.

It is 4:48pm, and it is the dreariest day possible. Overcast like no tomorrow--so much that you couldn't even see a shadow. With the street blocked off, all I see are a bunch of yellow shirts, no doubt worn by the Student Services staff, the self-professed "Dream Team."

Inside the Bren Events Center, giant screens mounted on the rafters show a live feed of the entrance. Some ASUCI execs are interviewing people and one of them is a girl who is cosplaying as Vanille, the most horribly voice-acted character in Final Fantasy XIII. Some people at the event are dressed up in costumes, probably because Halloween is just around the corner.

The giant screen flickers, and the Microsoft PowerPoint template flashes. The secret behind the screen is now revealed! To think that it is using technology as advanced as Microsoft PowerPoint!

With my press pass, I walk around the back tunnels where most of the workers are stationed. Security personnel are plentiful, but as long as you look like you know what you're doing, nobody's going to question you. So I'll gladly grab a slice of free pizza and a can of Mountain Dew reserved for the Student Services staff, thank you very much.

Is music supposed to be so loud that it strikes right at your chest? My heart is rattling like a Nascar driver in a roll-cage experiencing the greatest crash of his life. Them beats is that powerful.

Peter the Anteater is one buff mofo. Too much antler spray.

I wish I could Dougie as well as John Wall--but we all know that Blake Griffin is the future.

Instead of sitting outside on the seats, I decide to go into the giant mess of dancing people on the court. I probably should've guzzled down a few drinks because this is not my kinda scene. It's too suffocating with the stench of cheap perfume mixed in with crap cologne. It's pretty hard to move when everybody's grinding and writhing under flashing neon lights. What kind of hell did I just step into?

Groups of people are starting to leave now--I guess Kevin Rudolf isn't rockin' it. They might have the right idea, time to kick this Popsicle stand.

The Student Services Interns

I've been going through my notepads, purging it of outdated stuff whether it be old notes or ideas that just didn't meet the sufficient level of muster required for online regurgitation--yes, I know, I took a really roundabout way of saying, "I'm throwing out the trash," but it just sounds cooler the way I said it--and in the process, I found notes about a reporting excursion I had.

In the second floor of the ASUCI office at UCI was a room called Balboa Island A. I never really took the time to understand the naming convention employed at the Student Center but names included Pacific Ballroom, Emerald Bay, Lido Isle, Moss Cove, etc., etc.

In Balboa Island A was a meeting for the Student Services interns, and it was a week before Shoctoberfest. There were a bunch of balloons around and I had to wonder if this was a meeting or a party. As the meeting got under way, all the interns were supposed to stand up or sit on the floor, despite rows and rows of empty chairs in the back. Since I wasn't an intern, I sat my ass down in a chair.

Always with the icebreakers...was this necessary? Everybody had to meet two people, and I happened to meet with an another Thanh. He shook my hand and said, "My name is Thanh." I had to do a double-take--dude stole my words! Now I'm just thinking, too many Thanhs on the dance floor, too many Thanhs, too many Thanhs!

These people just operated on a whole different vibe. Too much enthusiasm, rambunctiousness, and spirit. What kind of ungodly collection of people have I stumbled upon? Who were these demented and highly motivated individuals who truly believed in their school? They were drunk off of their own energy, just babbling nonsense for the sake of reaction.

One of the guys said his favorite movie was "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly." He automatically wins the night for his supremely good taste.

Advertising has become really simple these days. Facebook spam, that's the strategy. Too many people abuse it--I should cleanse them from my Friends list.

It was story time now, the interns breaking into smaller commissions. I heard tales of eating loudly, working in the rain, and getting stuck in the elevator. I don't think these interns understood the meaning of the phrase "interesting story."

Enough of this, I'm outta here. Standing in the elevator, I realized that one of the interns was my group partner from my management class.

Small campus.

Build It and They Will Come Redux

"Build it and they will come."

It’s a very popular expression that promises a bright future for those who have the will, the guts, and the smarts to do something really great in this world. It says that if you have an awesome idea, a creative invention, just something really fantastic, then it is only a matter of time before somebody recognizes it and gives you what you truly deserve. I can think of many examples where something was built and the people came a’flockin’. Think about many of America's greatest cities: New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, New Orleans, Las Vegas, whatever. What do they all have in common? They was dirt before they were the giant sprawling metropolises full of life and vigor that they are today. As you can see, it was built and they came.

But does that still hold true today? The modern landscape has changed so dramatically in the last ten years that the old saying has become obsolete—I think it is in need of a little renovation. If you look at today's world, you will realize that everything has already been built, and that everybody has already come. There is no more room to build and there are no more people to attract and therein lies the central problem.

For most of us, we're all struggling post-high school stragglers. We're either in college or we're working, or, third option, just sitting on our asses doing nothing. We are the sorry result of the "build it and they will come" mentality to education. We were put through the grinder for the express purpose of achieving higher and higher levels of education. Me going to college was not a choice, but a logical evolution in the train of that thought that if you relentlessly build, then the money will a’knockin' on your doorstep. Statistically it's true, the more education you have, the more money you make. The problem is—it’s no secret to anybody. Everyone is chasing that same level of education so even after you get your bachelors, your masters, or even PHd, the chances are, there are hundreds of others just like you who went through the same grinder and built the same building that you built.

The problem with "Build it and they will come" is that everybody is building and nobody is coming. So how do you solve this? You have to separate yourself from the pretenders. I don't care how good your grades are. If you can't ask the questions that need to be asked or say the things that need to be said, then get the hell outta here. When employers look to hire, they're not looking for walking, breathing, living encyclopedias of knowledge, they are looking for people, people with attributes and skills, abilities, and above all, the ability to think.

What I'm trying to say is—we all have buildings already. There's no point in adding more rooms or more floors. What you have to try to do is, communicate why your building is the best, and show off what your building does that no other building can do. You can't just sit back and wait for people to come; you have to grab their attention, pull them by the hair, and take that sonuvabitch into your building and make the bastard like it.

"Build it and they will come?" More like, "Build it, advertise the shit out of it, and maybe, just maybe, they will come." It's not about more. It's about how, how you are different, how you are unique, and how you are you and not just some generic white paste. So just put down the tools for just one second and ask yourself,

“What the hell have I been building this whole time?”

I Understand

Writing has changed. There has been a shift towards faster and shorter writing. Too many competing information streams, time is precious, we must maximize every word! Not to the level of tweeting, just be concise. Like any species faced with its own extinction, I must adapt. No longer can I write those 500+ word bombs. No more megatons, more like cluster-bombs. Mini-bombs. More explosions, not bigger. That's the right idea! Easier to manage, easier to process, easier for everyone.

I, for one, welcome our newspeak overlords.