When it comes to my first memory of video games, it wasn't as if I opened Pandora's Box, unleashing a torrent of hell-frenzy, 8-bit blips and bloops, pixel storms and scrolling flicker lines. It is a rather humble memory, jumbled, and mixed in with all the subdued undulation of an ocean wave. My first experience with gaming didn't sweep me away in a tsunami, rather, it softly encircled me until I began to float to the shiny reflective surface of sprites and MIDI synth sounds. Retro all the way baby.
I remember Castlevania, Metroid, Mega Man, and of course, Mario. The NES wasn't something I touched, but a divine object, a relic worthy of worship. Gaming to me was something to watch, not to engage in when growing up. The messy and fun task of tackling gaming objectives fell on to my brothers, while I watch enraptured by their ministrations on the d-pad and A and B buttons. It was truly a vicarious experience, but it certainly planted the seeds for my full-blown passion of today, where video games are truly a meaty and substantive part of my every day life. A world without video games is a world without oxygen.
When I think of the toddling doe-eyed youth that absorbed his brother's digital feats on the NES, Genesis, and Playstation, I can only shake my head. How was this little boy supposed to know that one day, he would soon be able to play his own video games? That he would own not one, not two, but three next-generation platforms that include the PS3, Xbox 360, and PC? How was this boy, who, delighted with the Gameboy Pocket, would soon come to possess not one, but two portable platforms that include the Nintendo DS and Sony PSP?
I still remember when I was a boy, tucked away in bed at night, I dreamed of owning my own Playstation and playing "Blasto" (the commercials made it look great, sue me) all by myself. The thought was always "when I'm older," or "when I have enough money." That time has long passed. I've gone a long way since then. I didn't really become a full blown gamer until well into the PS2 generation. Until then, me and my little brother had to be content with playing our own portable gaming devices. Pokemon was a godsend. We couldn't touch the old Playstation, but the Gameboy Pocket was all ours. Pokemon was the perfect game for us to play. Then we steadily advanced to Color (Metal Gear Solid and Legend of Zelda DX, Oracle of Seasons and Oracle of Time, truly the best GBC games out there), and of course, the Gameboy Advance (Castlevania, Advance Wars, Golden Sun).
It was around this time that restrictions on consoles became lax. My brothers' enthusiasm for gaming had dwindled while mine only increased in fervor. Gaining access to the Dreamcast was a lucid dream come true (Sonic Adventure, Code Veronica, Shenmue 1/2), access to the Playstation was a nice bonus (Metal Gear Solid, Final Fantasy VII), but the biggest moment was when we acquired a Playstation 2 (FFX, MGS2, GTA, DMC, GoW, SotC, RE4 -- bonus points for understanding all the acronyms). Suddenly, I am now left with a predicament that I never thought possible: I have too many games to play.
The backlog is an ever present list of games that I've started, but that I've yet to beat. It sits in the back of my mind like a gnawing sensation that can't be satisfied. Some of my biggest and most memorable moments in gaming have to do with beating a game that I've been working on for the longest time. Final Fantasy VIII, which I borrowed from my friend for almost three years and restarted three times was one of the most satisfying accomplishments simply because I've been on it for so long. Hell, I've been working on Persona 3 for that same amount of time and I own the damn thing. Persona 4, Tales of Vesperia, and Yakuza 3 have remained untouched in my gaming library. Psychonauts and Portal has been sitting in my Steam queue for months. And I never got the chance to beat the original Star Ocean: The Second Story (re-releases give me ample opportunity to revisit though). Despite all this, I have the gall to borrow Assassin's Creed 2 from a friend, and just purchased Super Street Fighter IV. There's something to be said for the expression, "He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough." When will the gaming madness stop?!
The problem is, there's still a ton of games that I'm still looking forward to. Having just beat the shit out of Batman Arkham Asylum, I can't wait for the sequel. There's Red Dead Redemption in the pipeline, Alan Wake, StarCraft 2, The Last Guardian, Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker, Halo Reach, etc. etc. It's easy to see where I'm going for vacation: Nowhere.
